3am eternal

What do you do when God sets your alarm clock for 3am, and then speaks to you from eternity? Jenny shares her experience of a conversation with God; as part of our Wednesday faith story reflections…

…by Jenny Schofield

God woke me up at 3am one night, or should I say morning, I was not happy as I am not at my best then. He wanted to talk to me about praying. So, there I was in my nightie, in the middle of the night searching for a pen and some paper to take notes!

I am not very good at structured prayer. The idea of having to sit down and pray at a certain time is, I know, a good thing and I’m sure most of you can do it. I have tried! You would think when I lived on my own, I had no excuse and I suppose I haven’t. Except when I try my mind goes elsewhere.

I’ve gone to church for most of my life, not necessarily the same one, but I was a ‘Christian’ and I used to think I wasn’t a good one if I couldn’t pray ‘properly’.

Don’t get me wrong I love words. I like writing stories and poetry, but I panic if someone says, ‘we will now go round the circle and each say a prayer out loud’. I know it’s foolish. I’m not getting graded on what I say I don’t get a ‘D’ and fail. No one judges except me. But everyone else’s sounds better than mine!

Have you ever been in the situation when someone is talking to you and you wish they would stop so you could tell them something about you? You can see my problem. I don’t listen properly and that goes for God too. I don’t let him get a word in edgeways. Hence the need for a 3am wake up call. So here is my prayer and I hope it helps anyone who is still reading and can relate to my problems:

Dear God, help me to listen more and judge less. Help me to hear your voice in busyness of my life and to seek you in the in the stillness. Please carry on walking with me and holding my hand tightly in yours. Sit with me and show me the beauty of your world and all its people. Please just hold me close and never let go.

Love Jenny

P.S. I hope you don’t mind about the ‘proper prayers’ I’ll still try.

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